Rove McManus on Leno Recap: 3rd Time's a Charm

Rove McManus posts are a regular feature on this blog. For readers unfamiliar with Rove-which is most of you-he is a chat show host in Australia and I'm his biggest USA watcher. My love of Australian TeeVee dates back to early childhood- despite the fact I am not Australian. I know, I'm different. That's why you keep reading!

This was Rove's third time on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and it was a charm to watch. Yes, I know I have a slight bias, but really Rove's Leno visit was awesome.

As he introduced him, Leno called him "the most popular talk show host in Australia." When Rove walked out, he looked sharp and confident. Both qualities stayed with him throughout the interview. Unlike the last two times, I felt this time he was more relaxed. Also, interesting to note, this may be the first time I've seen Rove in a proper tie.

Remember, 99.9% of America has no clue who Rove is - even though at one time Rove was rumored to be shortlisted to take Leno's spot in 2009.

The jokes, many about experiences in airplane travel, were on point. The audience was exceptionally warm to him and his Aussie brand of humor. They followed along despite his tendency to talk fast. There was one slightly lame reference to Snakes on a Plane but Rove slide right on through 3rd without a skid mark.

Then Leno and Rove traded experiences about hosting a show and having to watch craptastic movies. Sparked from the Snakes on a Plane reference.

The interview ended with commentary on Rove's "20 Bucks in 20 seconds bit." The bit always ends with the question "who would you turn gay for?" And even the Prime Minister of Australia, Kevin Rudd, is not immune to being asked (he just never answers). The clip Rove chose to use was when an Aussie guest told him he'd turn gay for noneotherthan Rove - and then FULL ON PASHED HIM. (Kissed him full on the lips.)

I laughed when I first saw this on Youtube (Thanks Givesyouwings!) and I laughed even harder when I saw it, not in a little box, but clear as day on my television set.

If I had to grade Rove's 3rd visit, I'd give it a solid A. It's a shame he's not on in the US because he'd have a lot of appeal - not just because he's got a cute accent (oh you know you love the Strine), but because he's actually funny, and not forcibly so.

Thanks for the US visit Rove. If you're ever in Michigan, you know to Surf Unsalted, ring me up. And, if I'm ever in the land of Oz - you should hire me to work for Roving Enterprises. Just sayin'.

Photo (C) Richard Cisar-wright

BREAKING NEWS! ROVE McMANUS ON LENO

I just, just found out Rove McManus is on Leno - RIGHT NOW!
I'll put up another post with a recap of the interview - in 20 minutes or so.

Eli Stone Takes Natasha Bedingfield's Advice - 02x03 Recap

In Tuesday's Eli Stone, "Unwritten" a lot is at stake for Jordan Wethersby. Jordan is headed to court to defend himself against the other partners, Posner and Klien, to prove he's not suffering Post Traumatic Stress. And starting off, the two lawyers Jordan has chosen to represent him, Eli and Taylor, are arguing about everything - including the time.

Around the office, most of the associates are upset and questioning Wethersby initiatives.
And right on cue, Taylor is acting the bitch. I really am enjoying season two, and how it fits into season one, but I feel like Taylor's character has been rewritten a bit. Last season she was a lot more empathetic. I don't like her as much this year.

Nate then enters to talk Eli into taking a case against paint companies who manufactured lead paint. One of Nate's patients, at a clinic he's volunteering at, is suffering from lead poising and the apartment is most certainly older than the 70s. Nate took up volunteering some hours a week because he feels it's the least he can do to thank Eli, and the universe, for taking the aneurysm. Nate's patient, Lacey, is six.

Nate's also been reading their dad's "prophecy manifesto" and Eli is pissed about it and tells Nate to stop having "vision fever." Eli takes the journal and takes it to Dr. Chen. Dr. Chen performs a darker style of acupuncture on Eli, one that was written about in the book, and Eli "learns" that Jordan's case goes wrong if he stays on it - so he leaves in in Taylor's hands.

I say "learns" with the quote marks because as the story goes on, the question of who or what should Eli follow, vision-wise, is called into question. One change here, another there, upsets the future in this way or that, and in a bold move Eli burns his father's note book.

At the end, the future seems to have veered off course, with Maggie working for just Posner and Klien in the newfuture. That's not to say that the future can't be put on track again, but Eli realizes that he cannot change or control the uncontrollable.

Jordan does win in court, without Eli, and after Eli's clients settle, Eli gives his lead case to an opposing lawyer from season one - because Eli realizes that as brilliant as the lead paint case would be to go all the way to the supreme court, it can't be his fight.

Eli chose to live his future unwritten. He'll make his own way - but I still wonder if the darker style of acupuncture didn't lead Eli down a left turn rather than a right one.

Eli Live Blog - Mr. Stone Goes Supreme

Sadly friends, I won't be able to live blog Eli Stone tonight. It is impossible for me to be in two places at once. Instead of sitting in front of my TeeVee like a usual Tuesday night, I'll be playing like I'm a college student, listening to my good friends Common Shiner play at a college not too far from here.

It was a tough choice, but live music won out. I promise to have a recap of Eli up sometime tomorrow! Think of it as a live blog that slept in and was tardy to class.

If you enjoy music, check out Common Shiner. They play mostly in the Mid West, but were recently on tour through the East including New York City. Good Guys, Great Music.

Were the World Mine. This I've GOT to see

I know it's a "gay" movie, but I think everyone could benefit from seeing this film. I know I really, really, really, really, really want to see it. It's been winning festival awards from here to Torino.

The preview has a Dead Poet's Society feel to it, as Timothy (Tanner Cohen) is not in the in crowd, at his private school, because he's out.

His eccentric teacher encourages him to audition for Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream and he's given the role of Puck.

The Twist: He discovers the famous love potion hidden in the script, and he becomes a real life mischief maker.

From what little I have seen and heard, the music and spectacle is breathtaking. I grew up in theatre and on Shakespeare, and this is execution of stagecraft at its finest.

The music is divine. The goosebumps- meter ranks up there with a boy's choir preforming Prince's "When Doves Cry" in Romeo + Juliette.

The movie opens in limited release Halloween. Check their website, www.weretheworldminefilm.com, for a listing of cities. I'm enormously bummed because, as of right now, it's not playing anywhere near me.

If anyone from Waterfront Film Festival is reading this - NEXT SUMMER! Unless, it's already won, like, an Oscar.

Were The World Mine - Official Trailer


Were the World Mine - Song from Sound Track

John Green Made The List!

O, the power of community, in this case, the Nerdfighters.

In my email box last night, I was treated to an email from an overly excited Hank Green regarding the fact that first week book sales have been tabulated for his brother John Green's new book, Paper Towns.

Apparently, the planned effort by the thousands upon thousands of Nerdfighters (fans of the Green brothers; myself being one of them) has resulted in Paper Towns hitting #5 on the New York Times Best Seller list. I haven't seen the printed list yet, but I'm really happy for John.

My reactions to John's book can be viewed here. If you haven't read Paper Towns yet, I suggest running over to your local book store and picking up a copy. It's worth every hard earned dollar spent.

*John Green Signing Paper Towns in NYC. Photo curtisy of Renee M.

When Katie Holmes Meets Eli Stone

So here we are, back for week two of Eli Stone. Katie Holmes is joining the cast! Will she be as fun as George Michael? I hope so!

So take your dancing shoes off (I know you're watching Dancing with the Stars), and put on your aneurysm caps, and get ready for an exciting episode of feelgoodness!

Refresh often!

Preview Time! Eli goes to the Supreme Court and Jordan looses the farm...er firm.

10:52
Nate sent the ticket. And, he pulls out their dad's journal. Apparently, it reads like a crazy person's to do list.

Side tangent, Eli and Nate's scenes are some of the sweetest brother talks in televisual history. They always make me cry a little bit.

After reading the journal and learning more about Grace, Eli meets her at the airport. She has has a heart problem. The same problem that Daniel had. Does she get on the plane? (Nope!) Is she only meant to be a reminder that there are people in this universe for us. (That's what she thinks.) Grace is Hope.

Speaking of Hope, this show runs on Hope. If you're a fan, do you feel like you just listened to the BEST sermon your pastor could have given you? I do every time.


10:51
Back from commercial, we learn that Daniel and his dad DID know he had a heart condition before he enlisted in the Army. We also hear the most TEAR INDUCING letter from Daniel before he died. No, really, sob!

Back at the office, Eli SCREAMS to everyone his aneurysm is back. He says "I promise to try and not drop dead in your office."

After confronting Maggie about wallowing in self pity, he heads to Nate's. AND commercial.

10:41
Back from commercial, apparently, Eli doesn't know a good jazz place. He enlists Patti to help him out. Done and Done.

Off in court, we're treated to a heart warming video letter of Daniel from the war who seemed very happy while in uniform. After, Eli and the client fight about the affect the video will have.

I assume to relieve stress, Eli is in the bathroom washing up and is confronted by Matt Dowed regarding Jordan. Any minute now, Alley McBiel is going to see the dancing baby right?

Eli then walks right into a Taylor and Jordan catfight. The catfight continues between Taylor and Eli after Jordan leaves.

Oh! Katie (Grace) looks adorable on her and Eli's date. When on earth will the fire alarm go off, and I'm not just talking about Grace's menu catching on fire - literally - I'm talking about the toogoodtobetruebubble popping. And, after Eli saves her menu, they dance.

While they dance, Eli tells her straight up he has had a vision and of her. She BLUSHES! It's cute. And, they alllllmost make out.


10:29
During the commercial, I got chocolate cake, AAND some ice cream. Delicious! Eli brings Grace lunch even though she hung up on him. He got her 12 hot dogs rather than 12 roses. They smell, but they fill you up!

Next, Taylor is playing whiny bitch about her dad's new plan for the direction of the firm.

Back on the lunch date, we learn that Grace used to be a big shot bankruptcy lawyer and gave it up to save the poor. That's a page out of Eli's book. She flat out asks him "How did you get retained by God?"

On an irrelevant side tangent: I like Katie's hair. Eli must too. He asks her to have dinner with him and she says yes...because she loves jazz.

In court: (Movie Magic!) Daniel's father is on the stand, trying to make the case NOT to give his son a military funeral. He believes his son would not have wanted the stylized affair.

Back at the office (more movie magic!), the partners Posner and Klien have taken action in court against Jordan. They want to know if he's sane. He might be, but their motives are money and his are morals. Seems that anyone who has morals on this show has their sanity questioned. Why is that?

10:19
After commercial, we're still at the ball park. Katie's character is helping Eli clean off tossed slushies and hotdog chunks. Apparently, someone also threw cough syrup on Eli. Who does that? We learn Katie's character is named Grace and she's also a lawyer. Eli tells her he was meant to meet her. He also gives her his number. Then, he plucks slushy out of his ear and goes to visit Dr. Chen.

While Eli and Dr. Chen BBQ, they question the possibility that maybe Eli was meant to meet Grace to fall in love and not, like, be alone.

Then, back at the office, the next day, Jordan Wethersby and Eli chat about the new direction of the firm - Jordan wants to go in a more pro bono direction, only with pay and representing clients who do, like, good. Jordan is on the Eli wave! Posner and Klein - the other partners - are not riding it.

Next, Eli is meeting with the client's wife, Emily, Daniel's mother. They're arguing about what to do with Daniel's body. No resolution, Emily will be in touch. And, according to the father, that's the most she's said in three days.

Eli then RUSHES to the phone to answer a call from Grace. Apparently, SOMEONE sent the baseball ticket to Grace with a note that said "you're not alone," and that's why she was at the game. Did Dr. Chen send her the ticket? Or was it God. We'll find out, presumably after the commercial break!


10:08
Starting off, Eli and Nate are running through a park, and Nate questions how Eli knew he had an aneurysm, and right on cue; a vision on steroids with Katie Holmes. Katie is channeling Cathrine Zeta Jones in Chicago and a little Anne Margaret in Viva Las Vegas. Apparently, "The vision punch was spiked."

Next, Eli meets his Client, he is a father who wants to sue his wife and not have a military funeral for his son Daniel who died in Iraq but not from the war.

And just like that, we're at a baseball park! During this scene, Katie's character is fighting with a fan and Eli steps in to save her by cheering against the home team. The-something-or-anothers.

Live Blog Tonight - ELI STONE 02x02

I'm gearing up to live blog Eli Stone tonight. Katie Holmes makes her return to network TeeVee as, I'm not sure yet...

I know she's at least playing a part in one of Eli's visions.

Check out the preview below and come back tonight, 10pm EST for a full, refresh-often Eli event.





Thanks to youtuber kittyfan089 for uploading the preview!

The 9 Odd Questions I like to ask people when I meet them

I'm an advocate of asking people atypical questions when you first meet. Rather than, "How are you?" "Isn't this unseasonable weather awesome/crappy?" and "How do you know so-and-so?" here are some questions you can ask that might tell you more about a person than his or her taste in weather.

1. Do you lick the aluminum foil lid on your yogurt after opening it?
2. Do you find the smell of freshly pumped gasoline attractive?
3. Have you ever ate your sandwiches inside out? (opening it, eating the meat, tomatoes and such, and then eating the bread last.)
   
4. What’s the longest you’ve ever slept?
5. Who’s your favorite Kennedy?
6. What's the coolest thing you can do with your littlest toe?
7. If you got to name the 8^th dwarf, what would you call him?
8. Which Ninja Turtle is your favorite?
9. Have you ever Googled yourself?

My answers:

1. Yes. Right after I poke a little hole in the top and peal it off.
2. I do actually. I've often said there should be a perfume with this fragrance.
3. I almost always eat my sandwich this way. This is because usually my mouth does not physically open wide enough to fit a large sandwich in it to take a bite. On dates or business meetings I NEVER order a sandwich because of this.
4. 19 hours. Without drugs.
5. Bobby. He was wicked smart.
6. Wiggle it.
7. Confident
8. Raphael - He's the smexy-James Deanish one.
9. Yes. Nothing interesting comes up. 'Cept like this blog.
   

Live Blogging - Welcome back Eli Stone; You've Been Missed

Tonight, I'm live blogging the return of Eli Stone. When last we saw Eli, he'd just had his brain surgery to remove an aneurysm. We know that the aneurysm is gone, but we don't know how different Eli will be, if at all.

Because I'm pretty sure the formula would be lost if Eli didn't still have musical numbers in his head, I'm excited to see who's signed up to play the voice of God. Find out, be back here 10pm EST and refresh often!

Preview Time! Katie Holmes sings and Eli is destined to change the world.

10:58
Back from commercial and back at the rescue site, we learn that they've found Jordan Wethersby. Mr. Wethersby and Taylor have a moment. Nate calls Eli and together they do an MRI on Eli to discover what Eli already knew - that his aneurysm is back.

In the last minutes, Eli and Nate, Eli and Taylor, Eli and Mr. Wethersby all have moments.



10:54
After the commercial brake, Eli is speaking to his vision. Very "I see dead people," Eli realizes he doesn't know her name. He wonders if she's God. She says she's a fiduciary, and in legal vocabulary, they discuss the terms of the aneurysm agreement. Eli decides to sacrifices himself, and his normal life, to take on the role God - whoever God is - wants him to.

Walking into the court room, he takes the leading role that God seems to want him to take and argues on the case that Eli believes Eli. AND HELL IF THE NEWS DIDN'T CUT INTO ELI'S CLOSING STATEMENT! The show resumes just in time to see the judge rule against Eli.

In the courthouse hallway, Eli convinces Taylor to trust him. "You gotta have faith!"


10:43
Back from commercial, Nate and Eli are trying to figure out how to get a court injunction to force the rescue team to look for Jordan where Nate saw him in his vision. Maggie convinces Mrs. Wethersby agrees to go to court. Taylor on the other hand, does not and volunteers, pro bono, for the city. Nate collapses at the court house.

At the hospital with Nate, Eli gets a call - he's not eligible to practice law. He looks at his "permission slip" and sees there is no signature. After going to her exceptionally vacant office, Eli realizes his psychologist has been a vision.

What part of today's events can Eli trust?

10:33
When we return from commercial, everyone in the office is watching the news trying to glean if Mr. Wethersby is among the victims in the bank. Nate shows up at the office, and Eli takes him to see Chen. Hesitant to have acupuncture, Nate makes a crack about not getting stalked from "the other guy from WHAM." Reluctantly, he accepts the acupuncture and learns that Whethersby trapped in the stairwell.

While trying to convince the rescue crew where where to look, Eli and Nate are confronted by a visibly upset Taylor. She's not happy to see Eli.

I should point out, through Nate, Eli is beginning to realize what he's lost and, hopefully, by the end of the premiere he's the one taking up the charge.


10:23
NO JOKE! My cable just went out! Thankfully, I flipped to another station of ABC, and behold Eli! I missed a moment or two, but Nate visited Eli to tell him what happened. Eli believes it a sign. Nate thinks it jitters about moving in with his girlfriend.

Next we see Mr. Jordan Wethersby taking to his daughter Taylor. He misses the eccentric Eli, and has learned that they now live independently from him.

After Nate leaves, Eli goes to visit Dr. Chen, his spiritual acupuncturist turned smoothie maker. Like Mr. Wethersby, Dr. Chen believes that they do not live interdependently from Eli. Dr. Chen believes that they've all been touched by Eli's visions. As he's talking, we see Mr. Wethersby walk into a bank, and just as expected, a crane falls.


10:15
We open with Eli retelling of a vision he had, Loretta Devine singing dancing "Dancing in the Street" on the streets of San Francisco It's quite the musical number. We then learn that Eli can't go into court until his psychologist Sigourney Weaver. The banter back and fourth is a fun way to recap for new viewers what happened over last season, and what's changed since last we saw Eli.

At the end of the exchange, she signs his "permission slip" allowing him to practice law.

Then, there's a twist. Eli's brother, Nathan, had a vision he walked into a bank and a crane fell through the skylight. Now Nathan knows what Eli's been through, but hopefully he doesn't need major brain surgery to "fix it."

Epic Fail - Saying You're Sorry and Meaning it.

Today I had to do something no one enjoys: Apologize.

If I am being honest, I hate to admit I've made a mistake or that I am wrong. But when I have or I am, I do it. And, I mean it.

Most often my short comings need to be pointed out to me. Like most, I tend to live blissfully unaware of the many, many things I do wrong each day. I have a habit of misspelling metaphor (I usually add an e). I have a horrible aptitude for letting my fingers get ahead of me while I type. Sometimes these minor offenses do major damage, and today was one of those days.

Well, actually, the grammatical errors in question occurred on Friday but weren't made known to me until today. Recently, for a project, I had to write an article about someone I know personally. This article was intended to detail the person's accomplishments. Unfortunately, the glaring grammatical errors took away the feeling of pride.

This makes me so mad! Not at this person, but at myself. In trying to take something this person wrote, and fit it into a format, I inadvertently cut out key letters and key words that I wouldn't normally do. I'm not making excuses, I just want to be clear on how it happened. That day, I relied too heavily on the assumption that what I was cutting and pasting would be proofed. That's my fault. I shouldn't make assumptions - especially when I run the risk of hurting someone's feelings.

In truth, I feel terrible that I allowed those mistakes to be published. I let my friend down. I let myself down.

However, there are two upsides, if you're inclined to go looking for them, to this experience. The first is that I know this person is a good friend. It took great courage for my friend to approach me and tell me that they were upset. That's hard. That's a brave and mature act and one aspect of their character that I wish more people had. It's one of the many reasons I respect my friend.

The second is it allowed me to practice my listening and apologizing skills. Too often the person who is being confronted takes a defensive role. They make excuses for how things happened, and in doing this, they often interrupt and stop listening. When listening stops occurring, proper apologies are never given.

In his "Last Lecture" Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams, Randy Pausch said "Apologize when you screw up and focus on other people, not on yourself." These are words by which to live.

I let my friend do the talking, and when I apologized, I focused on my friend's feelings. I didn't allow myself to care how it made me feel; anger and embarrassment being two. I calmly let my friend know how sorry I am and how much they mean to me. It can be hard to not allow your own feelings get in the way of a proper apology. I believe apologies start with listening followed quickly by taking a moment to think.

Above all, mean it.

TamaRant readers, have you had a reality check like this? How did you handle it?

Paper Towns - Just Maybe the Best Book I’ve ever Read

I don’t say this lightly. I don’t say this because I’m getting paid to say it. I’m saying this because I mean it. If you read one book this year, read Paper Towns by John Green.

I’ve been watching John and his brother Hank on their YouTube channel, vlogbrothers, for almost two years now. Maybe you know what it feels like when you become attached to your favorite sitcom cast (like Friends or Seinfeld) or you believe you intimately know the characters of your favorite book series (like Harry Potter); real or not, you. know. them. Half way through the Brotherhood 2.0 project I did begin to think of John and Hank as friends. I may not know the inner workings of their mind, but I felt happy every time their little faces popped up on my youtube subscriptions page.

Paper Towns came alive for me like no other book has before it. I could pick out the intimate parts of John and the superficial ones. I can remember pieces over the course of last year from Brotherhood 2.0 that in some fashion made their way into the landscape of Paper Towns.

That’s not to say that Paper Towns won’t come alive if you’ve never seen a John Green video. It will and it does.

I don’t at all want to focus on plot, because I don’t want to give too much away. I want to focus on theme. How well can you know a person? Sympathy and Empathy are the tools, but there are always understandings and misrepresentations in what you believe about someone else. This starts with the cover of the book. There are two, and they’re two very different emotions and representations of the same model. Neither are wholly accurate a picture of the character she represents – Margo Roth Spiegelman.

In reality, we all have a Margo Roth Spiegelman. Someone who perhaps we hold a little too high on a platform. Someone who we believe to know the inner workings of their mind. A person who we believe we know better than the person him/herself.

We have people who are shades of Margo. People who we judge and put into categories. We do this regardless of what age we are; from the moment we’re able to form our own opinions we begin to organize people into their “proper” groups. Rarely are these groups accurate.

There are twists and turns along the journey to discover that truth, to discover the meaning behind Paper Towns. During one part in particular, I was crying on one page and immensely angry at John for what I was reading, only to turn the page and have my tears turned into laughter. I felt surprise and wonder at how closely my reactions to the words on the page mirrored the characters and their emotions.

John’s writing works like few young adult writers are able to do. Usually, you can see how the story ends before the book does. Usually, you’re pulling from knowledge of story devices and story clichés to come to your conclusions. I’m a well educated reader and writer, but every time I pulled from my previous story experiences I was wrong.

Read Paper Towns. Discover Paper Towns. Then, look around and see your world come to life.

Miss Muffet Gets The Mail

My parents were on vacation this past week, and during their trip they asked if I would tend to their mail box while they were away.

During the last day of mail gathering, I stopped over on my way home from work, pulled in the drive way, got out of the car, got the mail and walked it to the door. At this point, I insert my key and unlock the door, walking in to set their mail on the chair I've been collecting all their post office goodies.

It was at this moment, as I'm opening a letter addressed to them with a Columbus return address, (Yes! I know it's a federal offense to open someone's mail, but I also knew this letter was from my dear friend who lives in Columbus and it was a note about her wedding) I notice, out of the corner of my eye, a VERY large black thing hovering near the floor register.

Spider-Man has spider sense. I just have a nack of sensing spiders. I hate spiders. Frequent readers of this blog know just how much I hate spiders. A lot. I realize that this thing cannot continue to live. It's reached an intolerable size for being inside rather than outside. I also realize I'm the only person around to kill the beast. On that thought, I start to hyperventilate and begin to weigh my options.

There are neighbourhood kids. Maybe I could pay one the $5 I have in my purse to kill the spider. No! I'm an adult. I shouldn't ask a child to do adult's work. I'm also frozen in place, hyperventilating so my adult name should be Miss Muffet.

I think, this is ridiculous. I walked into the kitchen and looked in the supplies closet for some spider killer. Finding none, I remember that neither of my parents have arachnophobia and I'm the only family member who keeps large quantities of pesticides on hand. Now what? I grabbed the flashlight (that might as well be a baseball bat) and walked over to the spider to get a better look. If I'm going to tackle this thing, I need to know what kind I'm dealing with.

It's not hairy. It's brown. No violin on its back. No racing stripe either. It's squatty and not hanging upside down. It's not poisonous or venomous. By these observations, I've ruled out Brown Recluse, Brown Widow, Wolf Spider, and Grass Spider. In point of fact, Wolf and Grass Spiders are not dangerous, the latter is fast as hell and the former is gross as hell.

This is probably a Barn Spider. Just a large, squatty, and creepy Barn Spider.

I grabbed one of the newspapers on the mail pile. I take a deep breath and try to swallow my fear. I hit the thing will all the force of my softball playing days, and when I look at the newspaper, it's not there. It's not on the wall either!

I did the icky-spider-dance. I shook violently to make sure it's not in my hair or on my clothes. I made noises any child would laugh at. Mostly whimpering sounds. I turned the flashlight on to see if it's on the floor. I found it. Near the door. The bastard is still alive! Swallowing fear once again, I stomp on it until it's flatter than a quarter.

I'm was still enormously grossed out for the rest of the night; I was feeling a small twinge of pride.

It takes me a lot longer (20 minutes) to deal with a spider my mom would have killed in seven seconds. I'm not proud of that truth, but I can't help it either. Last night, I dreamed I was buried alive in a coffin filled with Southern Black Widows. The same dream I have every time I have to suck it up and face my fears.

I didn't sleep well last night.

1ORGY -- That's a deal braker for me

I like to think of myself as an observant person. My skills were on high alert this morning while I was driving to work. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a license plate with the letters 1ORGY.

You read that right. I had to do six head turns to make sure I read that right. I had. I pondered that logic behind 1ORGY the rest of my drive.
The first thought that went through my head was what kind of a person willingly elects to have that as their vehicle identification tag? Adult film star? Adult film movie maker? Wannabe Adult film star/maker? Or is it just a guy with a twisted sense of humor? From the looks of him, he seemed like a normal, slightly attractive guy, for as I could glean from looking at someone 20 feet away and driving 70mph.

This lead my to my next thought. If you're a single, attractive female who happens to meet this guy in a bar (or a single, attractive male if he swings that way), and he asks for your phone number, and you go on a date, and when he picks you up you see his license plate; is that a deal breaker for you? It absolutely would be for me. If it took me until the end of the date to notice it, he probably wouldn't score a goodnight kiss from me.

My final thought on this subject was the irony of the plate. 1ORGY. You see, as far as I'm aware, and I'm I'm not into these sorts of things, an orgy takes at least four people. So either this dude has only had one orgy (and by my standards that one too many) or he doesn't actually know what an orgy is. If it's the latter, then he's just a douche who wanted the word orgy on his license plate.

You're [almost] Awake Eli! Stone Stone Returns Next Week

Tuesday, October 14th, Eli Stone returns for season two. This is THE show last year I was most worried about not getting a green light for season two. ABC was slow to decide its fate while USA chose to renew Burn Notice almost immediately.

In any event, here we are, Fall 2008 about to embark on what is most often the hardest season for a young show. The trades are reporting that Katie Holmes is making a guest role (I've been avoiding clips and spoilers, so I'm not much help in the way of that) and that could be interesting. I know there will be more musical numbers, because what's a quirky lawyer show without a musical number? Answer: Boston Legal. While I love Boston Legal, this ain't it.

Boston Legal is The Practice 2.0. Eli Stone is Ally McBiel 2.0 with a little dash of Night Court. Off topic; does anyone else remember Night Court?

Because I'm really, really excited about Eli's return, and because Burn Notice is not burning at the moment (it's in hiatus until January) I plan to do my best at live blogging Eli's sophomore season. Having said that, be here Tuesday, Oct 14th, 10pm EST and we'll watch Eli together.

"You are full of shit" or Dealing with an Egotist

Over the years I have met my fair share of people who believe the world and all its inhabitants revolve entirely around them. In reality, we're all a little like this, that's why Blogger, WordPress, LiveJournal, and other sites are so popular. However, I want to address the people who go beyond healthy self interest and quite literally fall in love with themselves. This is not a new thing. The question is, how do you deal with a Narcissus?

Over the many cycles of my life I've come into contact with larger-than-life people. Charismatic, charming people who have a real talent for creating friction among social groups. We've all encountered them. High school is full of them. We might even have been them once or twice.

Here's what I've learned about these Narcissus' and how to rid your life of the drama they can inflict upon you.

Step One: Let them Go
The temptation is to fix something that isn't broken - yourself. Hanging around people who are continuously an egotist can often make you feel as though you're inadequate. You're not. The truth is, Narcissists have an innate ability to feed off your insecurities (we all have them) so they can cover up theirs.

All you need to do is remove yourself from their space. Sometimes you can't completely. You might work in the same office with them or you might share friends with them - but generally speaking you don't need to spend your time trying to make them like you. They can't like anyone more than they like themselves.

Step Two: Social Networking; Block Block Block
When drama begins, the knee-jerk reaction in today's cyber age is to cyberstalk. You obsessively check their myspace pages, facebook pages, AIM status messages, for anything and everything that might have to do with you. Don't feel guilty. The truth is, to some degree they're doing it too. People who live off drama need to create it.

Don't feed it. Block these people from your pages. Do it. Trust Me. Doing so will relieve your curiosity as to what they're doing on the weekends, and it won't allow them access to what you're doing on the weekends. There's no communication misunderstanding if you can't communicate passive aggressively.

Let me give you an example of Step Two.

Some years ago, when The Nomad and I broke up, we had a mutual "friend" who liked to invite both of us to the same movie and not tell either of us. This "friend" enjoyed reading my status messages and sending me IMs designed to make me feel bad or defensive. I was stupid then so I always felt like I needed to get into an argument with him about how he was wrong. I wasted a lot of energy doing this.

More importantly though, it took increasingly longer for The Nomad and I to heal our friendship. Had we not allowed other people to feed off our raw emotions we would have had a much easier go.

In recent times, when I am forced to deal with people who send me charged IMs, I don't feed into it. I don't argue. I don't get insulted. I don't waste the energy. I hit the block button.
I don't care about salvaging a sinking ship. Neither should you.

Step Three: Remember Your Other Friends/Co-Workers
Whether you're in high school or not, you don't have to deal with egotists alone. You have lots of other friends. Rather than spending your time obsessing over why one friendship didn't work, spend your time cultivating the friendships you have.

If you have mutual friends, your real friends are the friends who are mature enough to love you both and not put themselves in the middle OR allow you to put them there.

Get some of your girl friends together and take a sewing class or do something you all enjoy. Throw a tea party - with lacy doilies and all. If you're guys, go drink beer and watch football - with lacy doilies and all.


In truth, this is all good advice to follow and apply to any type of relationship ending. Drama is Drama just as Flirt is Flirt. When you have no dramas you'll have no worries.

Why Hello Thrifty!

Yesterday, at lunch, I went thrift shopping with my friends Colleen and Michelle. It was a lot more fun than I thought it would be!

The last time I went thrift store shopping was in high school. At that time, I was shopping for a tyrannical director in need of some costumes for the play on which we were working. Those are not great conditions under which to shop.

While I was shopping yesterday, I first went to the housewares and to the books. I found a few things I might like, but nothing really stuck out at me. I saw some books that would help complete a series I've been working on - so I might go back and pick those up. They were in hardcover and will look good on my self.

I then went and shopped around the clothes. I wasn't looking for anything in particular. Maybe I'd find something for a Halloween costume or a cute belt or necklace. Then suddenly, a couple things jumped out at me. I mean like I physically ran into them.

What I ended up with was a never-worn shirt from The Limited and a never-worn neon-pink button-down dress (with neon orange belt) from Target. The latter will be part of my Halloween costume - any maybe I'll actually wear it next summer.


Question Time! What's the best thing you've found thrift shopping? Where are the places you like to go to find good things? Who are the people you like to take with you shopping? Let me know in comments! I always love a good story!

Goodbye My [Starbucks] Almost Lover

Sweet Pumpkin-spiced latte (Grandé, non-fat) was why I went to Starbucks yesterday during lunch. Starbucks never disappoints on their drinks, (or their cookies) and it never seems to disappoint on the eye candy either.

There I was, waiting for my caffeine surge when I noticed what appeared to be an attractive, seemingly straight male near my age studying. My first thought was grad student. My second thought was, "he's more attractive than the whipped cream on my latte - oh shit! I have whipped cream on my nose."

While I grabbed a napkin, my friend Colleen took notice of afore mentioned guy sitting near the windows and said, "I think he's checking you out." As I pointed to my nose, I couldn't shake the idea that she might not have been wrong.

He was clearly looking in our direction as much as I was looking in his, and while usually I'd be inclined to believe that it's probably out of fear or annoyance on his part, he was doing the awkward stretch to look up. You know, the one where you tilt your head back to make it look like you have a neck cramp. The neck stretch that lingers a little too long and not far enough back. That one.


Readers! What do you do in this situation? Should I have walked over to him, handed him my business card, wink and say, "Hope to see you soon," and walk away? Honestly, that's all the time I had. I mean, if I had brought my laptop and intended to stay a while I might have used the, "Can you watch my stuff for a minute?" while I duck into the bathroom to practice my pouty-lip-face.

Friends of TamaRant, how many of you have met your significant other at a coffee shop? What are some of your casual pick up lines - that have worked. Share your stories and lines in comments!

Pure Michigan - FALL into FALL

Below is a fun commercial narrated by, Michigan native, Tim Allen.



I know that officially autumn started last week, but on that day it was 80 and sunny while today it's 50 and rainy. Hence today I'm reflecting on the season change.

I'm not really a fall person. I don't enjoy cold weather very much. I don't look all that spectacular in olive green and orange either. But, it is true that few places in the world do autumn as pretty as the Michigan landscape. So this year, I'm going to try [very hard] to embrace all that Fall has to offer. Pumpkin carving, squash, wax-paper-and-leaves. All of it. I'm going to live as though I were seven again - a seven year old who enjoys eating squash.

This past Thursday, I made spaghetti squash; a fall squash that when cooked looks like spaghetti noodles. It was pretty good! I slapped some sauce on it along with some cheese and wrapped up in my sweater and slippers with my hot coco while I worked on writing. Warm fuzzies galore.

This year, I'm going to try and go to a corn maze, visit an apple orchard, and walk through a haunted house. The latter being an actual haunted house and not just a walk through where people try to scare me by jumping out at me with latex and BenNye all over their faces.

This year, autumn is going to be great. Or I'll pretend like it is.